When I was little, I loved dialing toll free numbers. 1 800 numbers or 888 numbers, it made no difference to me. I remember sitting around in an airport, bored to the point of hysterics. At seven years old, it did not take me very long. My older cousin thought it would be a good idea to start dialing toll free phone numbers to entertain me. He pounded on the phone for a moment then turned to me and asked me for my home phone number. As I told him, he started punching in the numbers. Once he had punched all of the numbers, he handed me the phone. It was ringing. He had just dialed 1 800 before my phone number. Even before anyone picked up on the other end, it seemed as if this could keep me busy for hours. It did, right up until our flight finally departed, hours behind schedule.
Now things have changed. When I was little, it was exciting to talk to some random stranger from who knows where. It was fun. But now, I dial 888 numbers because I need tech support for my computer or to use my phone card. Sitting around on hold does not even come close to exciting me. Just half an hour ago, I spent twenty minutes on the phone waiting for Dell customer support. After listening to the same, generic, "we are here to please you," phrase half a dozen times I was frustrated.
While it may be a little more economical for firms to use automated phone messages for their 888 numbers, it is a miserable experience for the customer. Speaking from personal experience, I cannot imagine that it leaves customers with a positive outlook on the company. It is great that they offer a toll free number to call, but spending half an hour or more on the phone just to have a simple question answered is infuriating.
One of the first things I learned about in my intro economics class is opportunity cost. I found it to be a very interesting concept. Essentially, the value of your time should be determined by your best alternative choice-- the thing you could be doing if you were not working. Or, if you are lounging around on your couch on a sick day, the money you could be making is your opportunity cost. In other words, time has value and what your time is worth depends on what you do or could do with it. With that said, the time spent sitting around on the phone listening to cheesy elevator music and a poor generic phone message, costs me time and money. I could be getting some work done. I could be reading an interesting article in "Outside" magazine about some attempt to summit Mount Everest. I could be deciding who I was going to vote for.
When I was a kid, I loved toll free numbers. While I did not dial them often, they were an adventure (maybe I was an odd kid). Regardless, I have grown up a lot since then. I feel pretty confident that I have joined the rest of the country that does not enjoy sitting around on the phone waiting for an operator to free up, just so that they can redirect you to someone else so that you can repeat the process all over again. That is my social critique for the day. To all of those 888 numbers out there that have someone with a pulse on the other side, thank you. In the United States, which is supposedly becoming a service based economy, it is nice to actually get some service. We notice that you are putting in the extra effort. And to those who are running almost entirely automated toll free numbers, I already told you how I felt. As it would happen, your automatic message systems and not-so-soothing elevator music were the only thing on the other end of the line.
By David Wade